Conflict is what happens. Repair is what comes after.
Conflict is any moment of friction, misalignment, or tension. It doesn't have to be a fight. It can be a tone, a misread moment, a recurring difference that surfaces again.
Repair is how you come back to each other afterward. And repair, how long it takes, what it looks like, what each person needs for it to feel complete, varies more between couples than almost anything else.
Why compatible conflict styles aren't enough
You and your partner might both be the type to disengage during conflict, cool down, and come back later. That's a compatible conflict style.
But if one of you needs explicit acknowledgment before you feel repaired, and the other assumes that returning to normal conversation means it's over, you'll keep ending up in the same place. Not because of how you fight, but because of what each of you needs for it to actually be done.
The moment of rupture is usually visible. The moment of repair is often invisible, which is exactly why it keeps getting missed.
What repair actually looks like
Repair isn't necessarily a long conversation. Sometimes it's a specific acknowledgment. Sometimes it's physical closeness. Sometimes it's someone saying "I understand why that landed wrong", not "I'm sorry" generically, but something more specific.
The question to ask each other isn't "are we okay?" but "what does okay actually feel like for you?" The answers are often different, and knowing the difference changes everything.
How to use this from your Attune results
Your Attune results include two separate dimensions relevant here: Conflict Style (how you each handle friction in the moment) and Repair (what it takes for things to feel genuinely resolved).
Look at both. Notice whether your repair needs match your conflict styles, or whether they're out of sync. That mismatch, if it exists, is worth a specific conversation, not a general one about "how we handle conflict," but a specific one about what done actually feels like.